Postcard Humor

My Hunting Trip-How It Really Happened!

1am-Alarm Clock Rings
2am-Hunting Party Arrive. Drag You Out Of Bed
2:30am-Throw Everything Except The Kitchen Sink In The Pickup
3 am-Leave For The Deep Woods
3:15am-Drive Back Home And Pick Up Gun
3:30am-Drive Like Hell To Get To The Woods Before Daylight
4 am-Set Up Camp-Forgot Tent.
4:30am-Head Into The Woods
6:05am-See 8 Deer
6:06am-Take Aim And Squeeze Trigger
6:08am-Load Gun While Watching Deer Go Over The Hill
8 am-Head Back To Camp
9 am-Still Looking For Camp
10am-Realized You Don't Know Where Camp Is
Noon-Fire Gun For Help-Eat Wild Berries
12:15pm-Run Out Of Bullets-8 Deer Come Back
12:20pm-Strange Feeling In Stomach
12:30pm-Realize You Ate Poison Berries
12:45pm-Rescued!
12:55pm-Rushed To Hospital To Have Stomach Pumped
3pm-Arrive Back In Camp
3:30pm-Leave Camp To Kill Deer
4pm-Return To Camp For Bullets
4:01pm-Load Gun-Leave Camp Again
5pm-Empty Gun On Bird That's Bugging You
6pm-Arrive At Camp-See Deer Grazing At Camp
6:01pm-Load Gun
6:02pm-Fire Gun
6:03pm-One Dead Pickup Truck
6:05pm-Hunting Partner Returns To Camp Dragging Deer
6:06pm-Repress Strong Desire To Shoot Hunting Partner
6:15pm-Take Pickup, Leave Partner And His Deer In The Woods
6:25pm-Pickup Boilz Over-Hole Shot In Block
6:26pm-Start Walking
6:30pm-Stumble And Fall-Drop Gun In The Mud
6:35pm-Meet Bobcat
6:36pm-Take Aim
6:37pm-Fire Gun-Blow Up Barrel (Plugged With Mud)
6:38pm-#@*#&@ Pants
6:39pm-Climb Tree
9pm-Bobcat Departs-Wrap #@*#&@ Gun Around Tree...............
Midnight-Home At Last



Copyright © 2014 M.E. Masterson All Photographs Copyright © 2014 M.E. Masterson